A Man's Perspective - Week 8

A few random thoughts from week 8 - The "These girls do something besides tan and drink champagne" episode.

- I think the highlight of this week's episode was seeing the portrait of Shawntel and her sisters. Hopefully 80 years from now, that picture is on display sitting right next to their urns.
- On second thought, the intro to Shawntel's Chico hometown date was the highlight of week 8. That commercial was CLASSIC!! I thought it was an SNL skit at first
- I love when reality television hits the streets of New York. In every other state, you see random people stop to look at the camera, smile or waive. People on the street in NY just keep walking and see the cameras as an inconvenience.
- Why wouldn't Brad kiss Emily? Did he really think little Rickey was going to wake up? If she can fall asleep with a cameraman two feet from her bed, I doubt she is going to hear you smooching downstairs.
- So let me get this straight, ABC really needed to fly all four girls across the country for one of them to get dumped??!! I suggest a rose ceremony over Skype after the hometown date. Save one of the girls a trip. You could have the girls watch the rose ceremony with their family around, just like they do when they announce the teams that are selected into the NCAA basketball tournament each year.

Quote of the Week - Week 8

Brad - "Can I walk you out? Can I hold your hand?". I didn't hear any good quotes for week 8, so this week's award goes to Brad as the worst breaker upper EVER! I don't know if it is the questions or just the tone of his voice, but his consoling the girls after he breaks up with them is driving me crazy. And one more thing, don't put your hand on Shawntel's bare leg after you break up with her!!

Not a lot of advice for the girls this week and I doubt there will be for the rest of the season. These four girls made it this far because they have for the most part known how to conduct themselves on a date. They have made it past the dating stage and are entering into the relationship stage. For some people the relationship stage can last for years before marriage, for others it can be weeks. Clearly, any guy that goes on the Bachelor measures relationships in weeks rather than years. At this point Brad just needs to pick the girl that is right for him. Is he looking for the girl next door (Ashley), the beauty queen (Emily) or physical chemistry (Chantal)?

Advice for the Bachelorettes

Ashley - This is what I was thinking during the lunch scene. "She has really white teeth...she noticed Brad's crown. Oh yea, she is a dentist." Funny how you forget what these people really do for a living. Also shows why these hometown dates are so important. Brad gets a glimpse into what life with these girls might actually be like once the show has ended. Ashley's great relationship with her family was no surprise.

Chantal - She does a really good job of presenting herself. She is confident, she smiles a lot, she is well spoken, but not too choosy with her words, so she always comes off as genuine. Maybe a little emotional, but isn't every woman? Wow, what a house! Chantal obviously comes from money. I like that I didn't know this until this episode. My only advice for Chantal - You are a very attractive girl, but you need someone to give you the honest truth about what you wear every once in a while. That rose ceremony dress was not flattering. I didn't like your hair either. I liked the instant connection Brad had with wealthy businessman Mike O'Brien. Once your daughter is an adult that can make her own decisions, you don't need an overly protective father. A good father-in-law relationship should be friendly and not a father/son relationship.

Emily - Not much to talk about here. Emily is still super hot. She finally seemed natural when she was with her daughter. The only problem with this hometown was Brad. He obviously has little experience with kids and he is talking way too much about being Rickey's dad. Is it Ricky or Rickey? Interesting that once you have kids, the home town date doesn't include the Bachelorette's parents.

A few words for our parting Bachelorette

Shawntel - Hometown dates should give Brad a little taste of your life away from the show and to introduce Brad to your family. The key word is "little". Note to Shawntel - your job is not your life. I can understand bringing Brad to the funeral home, but spending the entire afternoon there shows Brad that your work might just be your life and if so, you have nothing in common. Shawntel's conversation with her dad made me feel sad for Shawntel. I think it would be hard to bear the responsibility of a community that needs you. It restricts your freedom. As a guy, I would never want to be the reason for a daugher and her parents not getting along. I think this would be a dealbreaker for me. So my advice to all (2-3?) of my readers is this...if you have to choose between your parents and a guy, don't have that conversation in front of the guy. I like Shawntel and believe she will be better off without Brad.

Oh and here are the results from a quick google search on why Chantal lives in the most amazing home that I've ever seen.

O'Brien, 51, now owns one of the Northwest's biggest auto empires with eight dealerships in Seattle, Tacoma, Bellevue and Kirkland selling Lexus, Land Rover, Jaguar, Toyota and Acura vehicles. His new Bellevue Lexus dealership, at the end of auto row and bordering Interstate 405, could hold several football fields. He's been hugely successful.

Home Cooking

Two posts in one night?! Consider yourself either lucky or cursed, but if you consider yourself cursed, no one’s forcing you to read this.

Time to take the Brad home to meet the families, and we’ll start with Chantal. Her family is loaded monetarily. The Brad and Chantal’s dad seem more like brothers than a father-son type relationship. Chantal’s mom definitely has body parts younger than Brad. She should come with an ingredients label, touting herself as “90% natural human parts!” No idea where the foundation for body image issues would come from for Chantal, none at all. I like little brothers when it comes to meeting future bro-in-laws. Moms and dads are protective; sisters are inquisitive and want to hear a love story, and little brothers just smirk with a … “you either are or want to be boinking my sister right now” look. Those guys are the best. As for the possible future bro-in-law, there’s really nothing you can do but smirk back.

Compared to a daughter, an ambitious tooth shaver, or an embalming kit, I think the pets would be the least scary for the Brad to take in. The Brad and Chantal have a connection, and it doesn’t appear that she would have much trouble relocating. She is an emotional smorgasbord that I’d get a little tired of. I fear that Brad would define her and she would look for him to give her meaning every day. It’s easier to have a partner who complements (that’s 2 E’s) you and is a positive part of your life, but not ALL of it. That’s my current question with these two.

Next we travel to Maine for Ash(ley). That fry-gravy-cheese stuff was some greasy grub I could get used to. When they arrived at Ashley’s parents’ place, I thought the whole family was going to sit on each other’s laps for a second. A bit awkward, but then a few sat Indian-style at the feet of Prophet Brad, like he was going to give a sermon About His Mounts (not to be confused with the Sermon on the Mount, which would provide more useful guidance).

Ashley's sister was tatted up like an American Lisbeth Salander (seriously people, read the books).

There’s nothing wrong in and of itself regarding the assurance, reassurance, assurance, reassurance game they’re playing. It’s important for people to know where they stand in a relationship and also hear it so their head’s games don’t take over the sane thoughts. However, in this case, I think it’s because they’re just not right for each other. My opinion only, which is not worth a Greek drachma (don’t flood my inbox, I know they’re on the Euro).

Shawntel brought the Brad back to Chico for a death tour, which is a really great idea for a lifelong attractive bachelor man thinking about ending his field-playing days. There is no way around it; that date was awkward. Shawntel’s dad had the business on the brain, and it turned into quite the guilt trip. Shawntel’s got a little rebel in her, so I say she eventually leaves Chico.

Although there is a lot of puffery (definitely could have come up with a better word there) on this show, I do believe the Brad is a pretty honest and respectable guy. The short term pain from hearing the truth is better than any alternative. When girls say he has set the bar higher for a future man to leap over, that should mean a lot to the Brad. There are times when we all get hurt or our egos bruised at the end of a relationship, but that shouldn’t cause any of us to lose sight of the goal of either finding the right relationship for us or wishing that other person the very best in finding it with someone better suited for them when it’s all said and done. If you can’t wish someone that at the end, you probably have to assess where your selfishness and pride are at.

Last, but certainly not least, is America’s Sweetheart, Emily. How can you not like this lady? The whole “I respect you and your daughter so much that I’m not going to kiss you” – “hey, wait a second, mister, but that little girl is going to be sleeping in that bed every single night so you better get your man lips over here” interaction was adorable. If Emily and the Brad ride off into the sunset together, they will be replaying that clip to their grandchildren some day.

Hopeless romantics are rooting for this story. As I say to all my lady masseuses (massi?), let’s go for the happy ending.

Boozer User

I was a little nerdy in my school days. I know, dang near impossible to imagine now. Think of it as a Steve to Stefan type conversion. It excited me when my cross-department classes covered the same topics. Stats are used in economics AND psychology … Awesome!

Well, I had the same feeling when it was revealed that the Bachelor’s very own reality villain Michelle has ties to another sports/entertainment time waster, fantasy basketball. Carlos Boozer left the Utah Jazz for the Chicago Bulls this offseason. There were many logical reasons for this, including leaving a small-market in Salt Lake for the windy city, dreaming of a potential title run paired with Derrick Rose and Joakim Noah, being coached by former Celtics defensive guru Tom Thibodeau instead of old school Jerry Sloan, playing alongside former fellow Dukie Luol Deng, leaving the mecca of those compelling “and I’m a Mormon” commercials before the brainwash becomes successful, or … for following the money. The last reason is a widely expected and accepted reason for the switch.

Well, could he possibly have left to get AWAY FROM the Money? Bachelor Michelle’s last name is Money. She allegedly (and I say “allegedly” because CBS News reported on it, and they’ve been wrong before) had an affair with Carlos that led to the break-up of the Boozer marriage (three Boozer and one "Money" kid involved). Michelle said she thought Carlos’ marriage was already over, which is so grossly negligent regarding a Utah athletic hero that she should get prison time. You can get dong shots of most athletes with a few keystrokes, so I think marital status can be figured out before you get it on.

Lots of people hurt in that situation I’m sure. It took the Brad a while to figure her out, but he’s got to be thrilled he let her go. The looks are gonna fade, honey, so you better start investing in your character before no one is willing to give you the time of day. … and Go Celtics!